Tiny testicles

If I need to weld something, which is a frequent challenge in my freelance writing gig, I know that I am only a few phone calls away from finding a lesbian friend who can help me. The same can be said if I need to operate a forklift, re-tile my bathroom, or paint racing stripes on my tricked out Go-Cart.

Or to build me a tricked out Go-Cart...because I don't actually have one of those.
Yet.

Anyway, just as in other areas of "gender conformity," lesbians in the workforce have pretty much ignored the whole idea of basing their occupational choices on whether or not they have a vagina. Most of my lesbian friends have vaginas. Well, probably ALL of my lesbian friends have vaginas. I mean, I haven't empirically confirmed this. It's not like I just walk up to my friends and say, "show me your vagina!" No matter what Pat Robertson claims. But I digress.

I'm not here to write about vaginas. This time.

No. I'm writing about lesbians in non-traditional occupations. There are a lot of them. Cops, and truckers, and construction workers...mechanics, and masons, and pilots...this is NOT to say that every woman working in a non-traditional occupation is a lesbian, no matter what Rush Limbaugh claims. (Please insert your own joke about Rush Limbaugh having a vagina here).

Anyway, I love the fact that there are so many brave and competent women in our community. But, there is a cost associated with challenging any social norm, and one of the people closest to me is facing it every day. And it pisses me off.

My friend loves operating heavy equipment. She worked her way up on a road crew, where she started as a flagger. She is one of the hardest workers I have ever known. She will show up early, stay late...I've LITERALLY seen this woman work so hard that she had difficulty dressing herself the next day...she had block sanded until her hands cramped, and her fingers were so raw she couldn't grasp her own shoelaces.

The road crew couldn't figure out why she was block sanding everything.

Ha! Just kidding! I'm referring to when she was working for an auto body repair shop...owned by a woman (Go Roxie and Bumper2Bumper Autobody Express in Phoenix, AZ!)...she wasn't block sanding while flagging. Or operating heavy equipment. That would be weird, you big silly!

Anyway, my friend is a hard worker. On her first road construction job (in cowboy country no less), the guys in charge noticed her work ethic, and saw her potential. They started training her on heavy equipment, and she LOVED it. She's good at it. To this day my friend lights up when she's talking about operating loaders and scrapers and other large orangish vehicles with tires bigger than my whole car...

She had been laid off seasonally and had to relocate to another state to get her son situated (because she's also a single mom, which qualifies her for a cape, or at least a free taco somewhere)...where she managed to get a job on another road crew. This time, with a group of guys who have worked together forever. Unlike her previous position (because not ALL guys are jerks, and some actually respect a woman who comes in and excels at the same job they do), THESE guys are jerks, and are threatened by a woman who comes in and excels at the same job they do.

She shows up to work at 6am, walks into the break-room, and all of the guys get quiet. Then they start snickering. She's studying for her CDL, and there are pieces of equipment she's never operated before. Rather than help her learn and encourage her, they criticize and belittle her. She has to work twice as hard just to avoid unpleasantness, and God forbid she make a mistake. They are ruthless. She's also beautiful, and although the guys walk a thin line as they try to assess her sexual availability, they seem to manage to avoid direct sexual harrassment. So, it happens indirectly. The stares. The whispers. The laughing as she passes by. The climate generally sucks, and she struggles daily to not get discouraged.  She deserves respect and professionalism, and it makes me angry.

I've tried to tell her it's not their fault that they have tiny testicles, and even smaller characters. I've tried to tell her that she should be gentle with them. She should try not to laugh out loud at them. She intimidates them, apparently, and they feel the need to show off for each other in order to bolster their distorted sense of masculinity. I've tried to encourage her not to run them over with the steamroller.

She gets to deal with little boys all day, and then go home to the respect and adoration of her son-who at 7 years old is already more of a man than those a$$holes will ever be.

There. I feel better.

Now, I have to make some phone calls to some lesbians. I really want a tricked out Go-cart.